Over the course of my life four women have been instrumental in defining me as a person. Three of those women are half-animal half-women who fight crime, each of whom is an expert at a unique and deadly martial art. The other woman, not pictured here,

This is going to be me in 2 weeks!

They let grad students join the cheerleading squad, right?

Come on, I really need this you guys, it’s my last chance to be a cheerleader

nedhep:

Brand management.

Is this a euphemism for “installing a Breathalyzer on your Tumblr app”

jonahray:

Top 5 Christmas movies:
5. Die Hard
4. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
3. Gremlins
2. Rare Exports
1. BAD SANTA

I feel like “Rare Exports” is only on here because it just came out. Like when Rolling Stone does their Top 100 Albu

that’s just how it is, ladies

Every time I’m on my way to a comedy show, I know one of two things will happen: I will run into the current Most Awkward Person I Know, or I will meet someone who sets the new record. I swim so deeply in social cluelessness that a lot of the time

UNFOLLOW THIS BLOG: Please unfollow Asterios today. For everyone who unfollows him today, I will unbuy him 1 chipwich.

Incidentally, for anyone who begins to follow me here or on Twitter today, I will buy Asterios 1 chipwich with real money, out of my

Rapper Asterios Kokkinos: Tom Sings!: Goddammit, I love learning that friends are also FOT’s.
Kind of reminds me of what it must be like finding out someone is also a “friend of Dorothy”. Just because we listen to a 3-hour long radio show every w

Hey sailor, wanna come back to my place and take measurements of the precipitation levels along my Moisture Pipeline

I’m a big fan of Henry IV of France – a pretty rad guy, as kings go – but I’d be a fan of him even if I didn’t know anything about him, because he is making this face in literally every existing picture of him. The motto on his coat of arms is La